The last few posts were about my research and opinions about various environment related topics and themes. But in this post, I’m not here to talk about our planet, global warming or environment. I’m here to talk about my self-discovery journey. I read “Eat Pray Love” and “The Alchemist” some 12 years ago and I literally felt that I would never experience such stuffs because it’s for the people who are confused with their choices and don’t know themselves inside out. My life has been an open book to many and they have been by my side whenever I needed them.
When I started self-assessment?
When I started introspecting myself, I realised that I’m not a perfect person, and need to learn lot of things in life. I won’t be surprised if I learn the tiniest of all things before I breathe my last. I discovered since 2021, that self-assessment is so damn important. When I self-assessed myself, I realised how I could have dealt with the adversities in the past. Having said that, I never imagined of doing things differently. Whatever I did and whenever I did, I feel I did the right thing, no regrets about it. In the last one year, I had gone through terrible heartbreak, suffered mentally and was scared due to my parents’ sickness. Recovering from these critical situations was not easy; talking about these to someone was not easy.
In the mean time, one day someone humiliated me without me doing any mistake. Facing humiliation and calling by names for having different choices was never acceptable to me. But later the person came back and apologised multiple times. I don’t know what made him comeback, but I’m glad that he came back and realised his mistakes. I’m not a perfect person, so I too keep committing some or the other mistakes blatantly. But in the last one month, this person grew as an integral part of my life and I’m praying that this person stays as one of the most beautiful parts of my life moving forward.
Earlier, I used to be a person who felt my independence is gone when I’m with my parents. I’m sure many of the youngsters of my age also feel the same. But since November 2021, I consciously and vividly understood my responsibilities as a daughter and how do I need to protect my parents. I also felt that living with them was important as they are getting old and they need me. When I was a little kid, they protected me in various ways, however they could. And now the role simply reversed and I had to take the charge, I had to make the decisions at home. I stepped into the shoes of the decision maker for my family. Believe me, it was the toughest role I ever got to play. But I didn’t lose hope.
Why I chose a life coach?
Taking help from a life coach or a counsellor doesn’t mean I’m weak. It means I’m working on myself and want to get better with each passing day. I have studied psychology during my university days and have been applying some of the relaxation therapies on myself which worked on me. But over the past few months nothing was working, I wanted to get better and I needed help from a professional one. Thankfully, I got the much needed support from my parents and close friends. They stood rock solid next to me to see me winning. Now I’m about to finish my life coaching sessions, and believe me when I say, I’m feeling much better, more positive and most importantly better than before. These sessions have helped me to discover myself.
Why do I value myself so much?
We Indian women have this tendency and have been taught the same since our childhood that, we have numerous roles to play. Being daughter, wife, mother, and various other roles at work place. But we tend to forget that who we are. We tend to look at ourselves and imagine what’s the purpose we are born with. I was never born to be someone’s wife or mother, though motherhood is the biggest blessing a woman can be blessed with but, that doesn’t mean I will ignore myself. I’m not yet married nor a mother, but hoping to get there very soon. But at the same time, I value myself the most as an individual and try to introspect every single day, that who am I and how did I achieve all, how did I reach here. My journey had lots of road blocks, but my journey made me “ME”, the woman I’m today. If I can keep my parents safe and alive after all the sickness they had been through, if I can keep myself happy and strong after all the betrayal and heartbreaks then I’m sure I’m the strongest version of myself and never going to get defeated.
So I’m healing myself, slowly and steadily and I’m grateful for the people who accompanied me in this journey. I understand how valuable I am at this point and how powerful I’m. Now I believe in getting a clarity first, getting rid off negative beliefs, taking inspired and calculative actions, having faith on myself, maintaining healthy lifestyle, letting go the clutter, and lastly, I try to have an enjoyable life.